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Avoiding Wellness Perfectionism

I recently listened to a podcast from a fellow coach who was discussing the idea of wellness perfectionism and it was soooo fucking good!! I love it when someone can bring me a new perspective on a topic that I’m familiar with and this definitely did.

The premise of this is that life itself is always 50/50. This might be a totally new concept for you so stay with me! What I mean is that even when you’re doing all the “right” things life is still going to suck sometimes, about half the time. This can be a super hard idea to accept because we are so conditioned to look on the bright side, don’t sweat the small stuff, and any other colloquialism you want to use for the get the fuck over it. BUT the reality is sometimes we should feel bad and sad and mad and all those negative emotions that society tells us to avoid. THIS IS HARD TO DO!!! It’s hard to do because we push against these emotions most of the time to avoid them and in turn end up swimming down the river of misery for so much longer than if we would have just felt the fucking feelings to begin with!!

In the wellness world, this is especially true. Breathe through it, go for a walk, do some yoga, eat healthy, detox, cleanse, and sleep well and all will be at peace. Now, I’m not saying that all of these things won’t help you learn to deal with your emotions in a healthier way, because they absolutely will!! However, all of these things can also be used to avoid feeling the negative stuff. Avoiding them doesn’t mean they go away, they will all still be there lurking below the surface ready to boil over at any moment.

As a wellness professional and coach (and a recovering perfectionist 🤣), I even find it hard sometimes to not lean on these tools to get myself out of negative emotions. It's uncomfortable, painful even, to process through heavy shit. Becoming more aware of your emotional state and tuning into your mind and body is a practice, not a destination. This work requires you to evolve. It requires you to release the outside expectations and stop telling yourself how you SHOULD feel or act or be and to allow space to FEEL YOUR FEELINGS!!

So today I just want to offer that if you tend to lean into this idea that if you focus on all the wellness activities you should always feel good, it's time to let that idea go. It's time to lean into your emotions and feel it to heal it. Use your wellness tools as a support system. Use them as tools to regulate your nervous system rather than ways to avoid and escape feeling bad sometimes.

Life is hard sometimes, and that's ok my loves.

If you’re interested in diving deeper into this work I’d love to help, shoot me a note and we’ll chat!

Imperfectly yours,


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